9781422270196

experienced a loss. The problem is that they struggle to identify others who may have lost a loved one, since almost everyone struggles with wanting to talk but not knowing whom they can talk to. Another reason grieving teens may be reluctant to share their feelings with their peers is that they don’t want to bring their friends down or make other people feel sad or awkward. Some young adults explain that they don’t talk about their grief with their friends because they don’t believe their friends will be able to understand them or offer the support that is needed. You may find that belief to be correct if you notice your friends are avoiding talking about sensitive subjects around you. Many peers of grieving teens try to avoid talking about topics that will hurt that person’s feelings. For example, they may avoid talking about death in general, relationships, or parents. Try not to misinterpret this avoidance as an unwillingness to be supportive when it is an honest attempt to be kind and supportive. 2 These perplexing feelings of wanting to be together versus wanting to be alone and wanting to talk about their feelings but not trusting that anyone will understand them can leave grieving teens feeling confused and isolated. Prolonged Grief Disorder or Complicated Grief On occasion, teens and young adults may experience such extreme grief that they become obsessed with thoughts of the person who has passed, preoccupied with death, or are haunted by the circumstances of a loved one’s death. A person with complex grief or prolonged grief disorder will experience symptoms that interfere with their daily life for more than 6-12 months. 3 Adolescents and young adults who already have a mental health disorder are more likely to develop prolonged grief disorder. 4 Chapter 2 of this book will explore this condition in more depth.

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Chapter 1: What is Grief?