9781422276068

Abuse among family and friends

Introduction

A man loiters in a dark alley with a knife in his hand, waiting for a young girl to pass by. A man parks his filthy van alongside a playground, offering candy to persuade kids to get into the vehicle with him. A man grabs a child who got separated from her parents at the local Walmart; before she knows what is happening, she is being sold as a sex slave in a foreign land. These are the kinds of images many people have of sexual predators. But while it would be wrong to say these types of events never happen, they are rare. The concept of “stranger danger,” which supposes that the greatest threats to children are people they’ve never met, is largely a myth. Depending on the survey, between 90 and 94 percent of sexual abuse is perpetrated by someone the child already knows. An uncle or stepfather. A teacher or coach. A neighbor, a pastor, a sister’s boyfriend. As uncomfortable as it is to admit, these are the true faces of sexual abuse. They take advantage of the authority (or perceived authority) they hold over children. Sexual abuse among families and friends can happen anywhere, irrespective of race, class, or gender. Crime statistics already tell us that the abuse is common — a famous study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimated that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually abused before they are 18. A more recent estimate put

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